A Perfect Child of Satan (2012)

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Avg Rating: 2.7 / 5. Voted: 87

No one cared thus far. Do you?

AKA:
Year: 2012
Directed by: Lucifer Valentine
Starring: Chelsea Chainsaw
Country: Canada
Language: English
Runtime: 00:21:22
Genres: Sexual-Violence against Women, Internet Dangers, Prostitution, Gore-Gruesome

Plot – Spoilers:
A prostitute is lonely and bored of her clients and their needs, many of whom are submissive men. She hooks up with a stranger online and is stoked to meet him real. A video diary captures her growing excitement as the big day approaches. Too bad for her, the stranger is one of Lucifer Valentine’s creations who doesn’t have courtship in mind.

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Heidi
Heidi
September 1, 2019 7:25 am

The tart was pretty dumb. Given her trade, the weirdos she meets, etc, did she really think it would be different online? Hope someone took in her cat.

Antinatalpist
Antinatalpist
Reply to  Heidi
October 3, 2020 10:59 am

I hope her cat ran out of meow mix

Dr. Lecter
Dr. Lecter
Reply to  Antinatalpist
December 26, 2020 7:05 pm

Bwahahahahahahaha!!

Don’twannasay
Don’twannasay
January 23, 2020 3:50 am

I’m scarred for life now???

Mike Tausig
Mike Tausig
February 9, 2020 11:53 pm

The third act is one of the most intense I’ve seen in a long while. The use of sound is spectacularly harrowing and provides immediate juxtaposition to the previous acts. Great short.

As always, thanks to the folks at EUM’s for uploading this and for the continued work in providing quality titles that are hard, if not impossible to find. We all appreciate what you do.

Heck
Heck
April 24, 2020 1:29 pm

Uhhhhhh I hope lucifer valentine dies in several separate fires. I hate you. Stop.

Gore Jess
Gore Jess
Reply to  Heck
July 2, 2020 8:43 pm

Hahahahaha……. Lucifer Valentine is extremely talented at what he does. If you dont like it, you DON’T have to fucking watch it! Wishing death on the guy, like your any better than the evil people he creates for his movies, ya know….. for entertainment purposes. So fuck a knife hehe….

Horst Samwald
Horst Samwald
Reply to  Gore Jess
July 21, 2020 8:44 pm

Agree, ppl are ?nice time

Antinatalpist
Antinatalpist
Reply to  Gore Jess
November 8, 2020 9:21 am

Damn Gore Jess! Telling people to fuck a knife.. like you’re any better than the evil people Lucy creates for his films.

skeezy
skeezy
Reply to  Gore Jess
March 26, 2021 5:02 am

why are you so triggered over a guy who makes shit movies

Kiki
Kiki
Reply to  skeezy
July 27, 2021 11:01 pm

Exactly, his panties are definitely in a bunch

Kiki
Kiki
Reply to  Gore Jess
July 27, 2021 11:05 pm

Maybe someone should fuck you with a knife for entertainment purposes ????

Leeuwin
Leeuwin
Reply to  Gore Jess
January 16, 2022 9:28 pm

Fuck a knife, uh? I wish I could XD

im blisters
im blisters
Reply to  Heck
August 7, 2020 11:06 pm

Oh come now ^___^ dont disrespect god !

Antinatalpist
Antinatalpist
Reply to  Heck
October 3, 2020 10:42 am

Lucifer Valentine sucks shit stains outta Rustler jeans.

Sandra
Sandra
Reply to  Heck
March 27, 2021 9:05 pm

Facts

BeastBitch
BeastBitch
Reply to  Heck
June 19, 2021 7:56 am

Imagine going on a site called “effedupmovies” and getting your panties in a bunch over a fairly tame short film…

Darrell Fine
Darrell Fine
April 26, 2020 2:45 am

Less clothes at 17:40 than at 19:04 and on?? My ADHD kicked in again…lol

Antinatalpist
Antinatalpist
Reply to  Darrell Fine
November 5, 2020 6:06 am

You mean your OCD?

Kevin Freckman
Kevin Freckman
June 11, 2020 2:41 am

It might be short, but this is irritating as all hell. More stupid than scary,

Sandra
Sandra
Reply to  Kevin Freckman
March 27, 2021 9:05 pm

Agreed

Eat the Rich
Eat the Rich
July 8, 2020 3:17 am

Just like irl it’s not all butterflies and kittens. I’ve never seen this guys work b4 but after watching this I’m intrigued.

nyct
nyct
Reply to  Eat the Rich
April 19, 2022 4:47 am

tbh this film is good but i wouldnt bother with most ov his other movies (if not all, havent watched all ov them) the others r just zo weird and dont make any sense, shitty angles and overwhelming background noise

tenya iida
tenya iida
August 24, 2020 2:42 am

a simple watch with a straightforward story. i enjoy that it’s not overdoing things, you make your own conclusion about the attacker and the victim. though I would say I wish certain shots were redone, I felt confused and overwhelmed at certain points

Nobody
Nobody
October 1, 2020 3:48 am

It went straight from how much she loved him to the the murder. Almost no time was spent on her finding out that he wasn’t the man of her dreams which was the only interesting part. A waste of time in so many ways.

Antinatalpist
Antinatalpist
October 3, 2020 10:50 am

Every time something goes down in a Lucifer film this distorted growl scream happens.. (the sound design) RAWR!R!!!!! So fucking gay. Ohh ho ho Lucy.. you whack hack fruit of the loom shit too soon little squirt.

Amparo
Amparo
Reply to  Antinatalpist
March 29, 2021 1:58 am

Hahahaha ily

b?by
b?by
October 10, 2020 8:46 am

She was so irritating. Watching her get fucked up was really satisfying.

Zed Man
Zed Man
November 8, 2020 10:16 am

Is this the same guy that made the VG trilogy? If so, he has gone a bit soft with this one. Reminds me of another short titled ”Flesh Meat Dolls” (also on this site) but that one has a lot more gore and other nasty stuff. This short was just, meh.

Eevie
Eevie
Reply to  Zed Man
January 17, 2021 4:51 am

Same dude.

Fire2020
Fire2020
December 26, 2020 6:30 am

Such a fucking whore

fred fat
fred fat
February 17, 2021 9:49 pm

remember if you see your mum to tell her SATAN SATAN SATAN

skeezy
skeezy
March 26, 2021 4:57 am

this is so bad lmao

Sandra
Sandra
March 27, 2021 9:05 pm

This was incredibly underwhelming. I couldn’t stand the noise. The gore wasn’t even that bad? 0/10 tbh I’m sorry

Sal
Sal
April 3, 2021 11:02 pm

This was so fucking annoying

erik
erik
May 4, 2021 6:25 am

I feel like this out of every film (which he does put content warnings / actor proof of consent) deserves that same treatment. I mean I get that it’s a short film but jesus christ.

Uncadollas
Uncadollas
June 15, 2021 7:20 am

Worst Audio ever. No story. Gore was lousy and totally fake.

Porușniuc Adina
Porușniuc Adina
July 23, 2021 6:24 pm

This was a parody..right? : ))))) i can.t take this seriously.And the audio is really bad

Kiki
Kiki
July 27, 2021 10:58 pm

I come to the comment section to try to figure out if the movie is something worth watching not a bunch of people going back and forth throwing around insults because someone doesn’t agree with how you feel about the movie. Grow up

Zed Man
Zed Man
Reply to  Kiki
July 28, 2021 2:15 am

You are making the same comments you are complaining about. Talk about being hypocritical. Watch the damn film and stfu.

Porușniuc Adina
Porușniuc Adina
Reply to  Kiki
July 28, 2021 9:11 pm

Hey Kiki…Maybe you should agree with other opinions.Have a nice day.Sorry if my english is bad

Porușniuc Adina
Porușniuc Adina
Reply to  Porușniuc Adina
July 28, 2021 9:20 pm

And don.t take it personal.It.s just a movie.

deeznutsinyomouth
deeznutsinyomouth
August 8, 2021 9:32 am

looks like it’s written by a 14 year old edgy kid it’s so bad lmao

deeznutss
deeznutss
September 24, 2021 10:43 pm

what kind of emo fag writes this stupid shit

muzan
muzan
Reply to  deeznutss
September 25, 2021 8:20 am

LMFAOO

Nicky
Nicky
September 25, 2021 7:04 pm

This is my fav of LV’s work. There’s no vomiting (which is great as I have to fforward it, not a fan) & it tells a realistic story of a girl who meets a guy via internet. And it shows the dangerous results.

GraphemeSynesthete
GraphemeSynesthete
October 21, 2021 5:18 am

@deeznutsinyomouth – You know levels of aberrance don’t stop at ‘edgy 14 year olds’ and ’emo fags,’ right? Of course, you don’t.

AyoPeePeePooPooCheck
AyoPeePeePooPooCheck
October 23, 2021 3:51 pm

I’d rather fuck the cat than her, jesus

expiredorangeslices
expiredorangeslices
Reply to  AyoPeePeePooPooCheck
November 4, 2021 9:54 pm

ayo what

Lee
Lee
November 4, 2021 10:59 pm

This is the only Lucifer Valentine I didn’t feel sick watching.

bast
bast
November 10, 2021 8:41 am

Litttle mumblecore short film. With a pinch of Satan. Cue the editing.

hahaha
hahaha
December 26, 2021 2:47 am

well…. that was amusing.

TheTaxman
TheTaxman
February 2, 2022 5:38 am

So fake what makes it so boring

Michelle
Michelle
March 10, 2022 5:21 am

Well…this was definitely something. I can say that it was a movie for sure. A good movie? No, but a film it was. Why do I subject myself to this? It wasn’t even the gore or the lack thereof. It was just so boring. At least the acting was good? Idk y’all.

nyct
nyct
April 19, 2022 4:25 am

honestly i know alot ov ppl wouldnt agree but i liked this movie. its more realistic than lucifers other films and all the other ones made no fucking sense and felt like fever dreams with weird shots and weird music and just u couldnt fucking tell what was going on. i liked the main character and honestly seeing what happened was really sad. most ppl would just be like well she was a prostitute what was she expecting and not care, call it some other shit movie but idk i was emotionally invested in her and the ending rlly made me sad. not the best movie but i didnt regret watching

ifuckincant
ifuckincant
April 24, 2022 6:40 am

an effective piece of shit. this guy does really know what he’s doing. it’s jarring for sure. there’s just no value to it whatsoever. serial killer porn

evilkitty1974
evilkitty1974
May 10, 2022 6:15 am

my 1st foray into the world of lucifer valentine – raw, left w/some questions (namely, how did her panties get back on??) but overall i find it to be a cautionary tale in vid form that i might show my daughters

An_Oldboy
An_Oldboy
May 10, 2022 8:01 am

A tinder date courtesy of Lucifer Valentine that is both predictable and boring, but will satisfy his 14 year old emo fans. Dross, 0.5/5 cats (but as always thank you EUM Admin for this website)

cannibalcat420
cannibalcat420
May 17, 2022 3:01 am

lowkey sucked